Watch Out for Quicksand!

When I was a kid, I spent a fair amount of time running around the neighborhood with friends, and as luck would have it, there was a creek that ran through some of the neighborhood backyards.  We wiled away many an hour looking for crayfish, avoiding bloodsuckers (leeches), and poking anything available (sticks, toes, fishing hooks, sand shovels, etc.) into the water.  No one worried about lurking strangers at the car wash (which backed up to the creek), or about falling in as we tip toed across rocks or swung from tree branches.  We did, however, keep a sharp eye out for quicksand.

I recently asked part of my inner circle about childhood fears.  Quicksand was on both my niece’s list and mine.  Her worry included a fear of being able to recognize it.  I didn’t have that fear.  I knew how to recognize it.  We saw it EVERYWHERE down near the creek.

“Don’t step there,” someone would call pointing at a sandy spot void of rocks or twigs.  “That’s quicksand.”

We’re clearly not alone in this fear from the past as I’ve seen this meme on Facebook, and it cracks me up every time.

Two of my survey sample participants grew up near or on a farm and they both mentioned childhood fears of the possible, or even probable.  MOH said he was worried about being squashed by a cow because they were so huge.  Both MOH and my niece mentioned being chased by roosters.

A friend at work thinks that kids today have more anxiety and worries than kids in the past because of technology.  I agree that news is global and instantaneous.  It pops up on cell phones which everyone, including kids, seems to have these days.  But although I’ll concede that some of the things that kids worry about today can be relevant, and perhaps more ‘real’, kid fears are nothing new.

Fear of being lost or separated from parents is not unusual.  I wonder if it’s a natural fear or one that our parents put on us.  I used to repeatedly tell my own young son to stay where I could see him whenever we went shopping.  But maybe its natural.  One of my nieces said she worried about not getting picked up from skating lessons.  I worried when my parents left me at home alone that they wouldn’t come back.   I used to talk myself off the proverbial ledge by assuring myself that even if they wanted to ditch me, they wouldn’t walk away from their house and all their stuff.  LOL

A close friend told me she used to worry about something happening to her mom, and if that happened, she would have to go live with her dad.  I wonder if the fear of losing your primary caregiver is more about the fear of not being taken care of, or of losing a person you love.  That might be territory you need to unpack in the presence of a licensed therapist.

Other unlikely, but real at the time, childhood worries included alligators under the bed, being kidnapped, the A-bomb, and swimming at night.  I didn’t worry about alligators, but I admit I was concerned about what was under the bed.  I also did not want any part of me sticking out of the covers at night.  I would surround myself with stuffed animals, my nose and eyes peeking out from a sea of noses and eyes.  I’m not sure of the thinking behind that little ritual.  Was I trying to blend in so that if the boogie man came to snatch one of ‘us’ in the night, I was hoping it was one of my friends and not me? 

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My sister says her childhood fears included heights, dogs, snakes, and bears.  “I still have the same fears except for the bears,” she told us.  “I guess because I haven’t run into any yet.”

Fair enough.